Thursday, December 9, 2021

Q&A with Simba

Marco Pass at sunset.

Marco Pass at sunset.


This column is the opinion of a 3-year-old African Grey Parrot named “Simba” who has an extremely high intelligence level. While he does not possess a degree from any college or university, he does have a strong opinion of himself and feels that he is the best candidate to answer the complex questions of today’s discerning pets…and the humans they own…

Dear Simba,
Happy Holidays from Denver, Colorado! I was in Marco Island on vacation a couple of weeks ago and had the pleasure of meeting you at one of the local restaurants. Might I say that your intelligence and gentle demeanor had me speechless (of course you did most of the talking so I really didn’t have to say anything). Marco Island is beautiful as well as the locals being so friendly and willing to take the tourists under their wing to show them the local lifestyle. I also had the pleasure of meeting your Administrative Assistant, Christina, at the closing ceremony of the Vietnam Memorial Wall at Veterans Park in which she sang the National Anthem for. She described Marco Island as being the most simplistic way to live. In her own words she said, “I’ve been living the dream down here for 24 years”. My question is what is life really like down in Marco Island? I plan to come back very soon and I don’t see myself leaving to get on a return flight home to Colorado this time.

Searching For The Good Life

Dear Searching,
Search no more! You have found paradise! Not only is Marco Island a beautiful destination, it is overflowing with culture, history and a really cool parrot! I would definitely purchase a one-way ticket to Marco Island…there’s no reason for you to go back to Colorado (unless you happen to be a professional shoveler of snow). As I stated during our conversation at the restaurant, if you want a nice relaxed, laid back type of life, Marco Island is the place for you. From the locals that serve tables and bartend to the business who sells you flood insurance… everyone is here for the same reason.

That being said, it’s time to start packing up Colorado and heading South (please get directions first…we wouldn’t want you to get lost and wind up in Mexico!). Make this your New Year’s resolution! While everyone is promising to shed 10 pounds, stop smoking, eat healthier, etc. You can promise yourself a beautiful island to live on! What a concept! It’s a good thing I’m intelligent… what would you do without my help? You would be stuck trying to figure out how to get back to Marco!

In closing, I’d like to extend the invitation to you to look me up when you get here. We’ll do drinks and I’ll make a few phone calls for you. You’ll be an established local in a matter of days. Good luck to you and we look forward to seeing you again! Have a safe trip back to Marco Island…your paradise awaits you!


Simba is owned by Christina Giordano. If you have any questions you would like Simba to answer, please email them to: Ask

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *