Wednesday, October 20, 2021

If I ignore it, maybe it’ll go away

Richard Alan

Richard Alan

By Richard Alan

I realize most men need to be reminded about certain events deemed important by the opposite sex such as first dates, birthdays, holidays, and the most serious of sins… to forget one’s wedding anniversary date.

Many of us alpha-males who have experienced “The quiet punishment” resulting from forgetting a wedding date or heaven forbid her birthday will be sure to make a mental note to self… I must avoid that silent torture in the future.

Good gawd, I got punished for forgetting what she was wearing the day we met! (So I bribed a close family member to remind me of our anniversary next year.)

Not unlike most men I’m busy! Even if there were ten days to a week I would still be behind in all I do. Heck, last season I noticed every time I needed to clean my windshield, forget it, nada, it’s empty! It took me nine months to actually get around to filling my car’s window washing fluid reservoir.

So when I see some guys come in my shop in the summer who are actually holiday shopping, making males like myself look bad, somehow these guys have discovered some kind of a time warp to slow the day and accomplish simple errands and even complicated shopping excursions.

Most men are like me, they hate to shop; it’s just not in our D.N.A. like gift wrapping, doing the dishes, vacuuming or dusting (There are exceptions if it involves one or all of the following… cars, motorcycles, boats, fishing, golfing, bowling and all the tools or accessories involved therewith.)

When I need to get something it’s a simple quest, not really shopping, it’s basically a need. I don’t give a rat’s behind where or when it’s on sale or not on sale. I need it, I go to the nearest destination and buy it. (For crying out loud, I know people who will burn a half a tank of gas to save five bucks on a watch battery)!

Many of you may have already felt the sting of presenting her a household commodity like a new microwave or cleaning utensil; my worst to my bride was a new floor steamer for our hardwood floors. I thought she’d like it! Wrong!

So when the majority of guys venture into a jewelry store, the term “A lost ball in the tall weeds” comes to mind. Relax, it’s easier than you think to surprise the one you love for that special occasion. Try something different for a change… Give her what she wants.

So guys, if you are like me and shop on or before the day of the occasion, a suggestion … you should actually think this out when it comes to jewelry…I know, I know the mental grief and physical anguish that even the thought of planning ahead can cause us.

So let’s get down to brass tacks. When was the last time in her eyes you did something right? (A month ago I washed her car without her asking. Of course that was after I washed my car and motorcycles!)

Presenting your favorite lady a really nice piece of jewelry she actually loves is like hitting it out of the park with bases loaded. Basking in the after glow of getting it right is worth the investment. Still not sure what to get her?

You can even flat out ask her or, I suggest, simply browsing with her in a jewelry store can even give you an idea of her likes and dislikes. Once again make a mental note of this important fact or like me, bribe a loved one to remember for you.

I know it’s not easy and when easy is the only option and all else fails try a gift certificate to one of my shops. The act of presenting her a gift certificate at least shows you made an effort to go to a store with her in mind… PRICELESS.

Just remembering a few of the following can get the ball rolling in the “getting it right department.” How to please a woman…

Wine her, Dine her, Call her, Hold her, Surprise her, Compliment her, Smile at her, Pray for her, Listen to her, Laugh with her, Cry with her, Romance her, Encourage her, Believe in her, Cuddle her, Shop with her, Give her jewelry, Buy her flowers, Write love letters to her. And in my case…play tennis with her.

Good luck, gents you can do it.

“What female heart can gold despise? What cat’s adverse to fish? Thomas Gray (1716-1771)

Richard Alan is a designer /goldsmith and the owner of the Harbor Goldsmith and Richard’s Reef’s on Marco Island and welcomes your questions about all that glitters. 239-394-9275.


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